Hey, it’s Librarian Husky. Let’s cut to the chase: do you like winning? Do you enjoy watching your ally struggle while you accumulate massive amounts of wealth? Do you believe in farming sentient creatures until a physical manifestation of their soul excretes from their rotting corpse? Sorry, that might have been too far. Today, I’m going to demonstrate the foolproof Deadlock strategy of becoming fed. Primarily, because I have a crippling addiction to big numbers, or at least that’s what I tell myself while I farm in the jungle, ignoring my teammates’ screams across the map.

Embracing Selfishness and Arrogance

It may appear that we are losing these games, but I assure you, we are not. Through the sheer power of selfishness, arrogance, and worrisome tunnel vision, we have somehow won games despite the odds. As geometry spans across four color-coded lanes, we apply unnerving amounts of pressure, slay an ungodly number of players, and, most importantly, click heads with precision. Success here depends not on helping teammates immediately, but on being the key damage dealer when it counts. Let them struggle, for you will be the one to turn the tide.

Welcome to Deadlock

If you’ve just entered Deadlock, the first thing you’ll notice is the variety of heroes. Some were shot, others frozen in ice, and one is just an outright jerk. No, really—that’s the lore. In Deadlock, you’re more likely than not to be a pawn in some larger conflict, a slave to the system. But that doesn’t matter, because the story, as is the case with many similar games, is secondary. Your real task is mastering your chosen hero and exploiting their skills to dominate.

The Story Behind the Chaos

I say “probably” because Deadlock’s story barely exists, and if it’s anything like the chaotic lore of DOTA 2, God help us all. Essentially, the lore could have been written in a hurry, where Walmart and Target hire the homeless to become professional hitmen—kind of like when my Aunt Diane tried to hire the Cox Communications guy to kill my uncle. If you’re curious, no, it didn’t work. The guy just reported it to the police. Deadlock takes place in a universe where everyone is hired for battle, and your job is to win, regardless of the ridiculousness of the context.

The Insanity of the Characters

The characters you’ll encounter aren’t your typical soldiers. These hitmen have superpowers and most are clinically insane. My Uncle Jerry wouldn’t have lasted a minute in this world. Here, both sides are in a stalemate, but to end the game, you must literally shoot one of them in the face. The premise is simple, but the complexity lies in execution, in how well you adapt to the madness.

Improving Your Gameplay

Improving in Deadlock is no easy task. This is not an entry-level game, so if you want to avoid being one of those players with a score of 1-11, you’ll need to sharpen your skills. My advice: focus on mastering one or two characters. This isn’t some cookie-cutter guide from IGN that gives you a step-by-step process. No, you need to experiment and refine your skills through practice.

Positive Reinforcement for Success

Here’s some positive reinforcement: you can do this. Think of your gameplay like training a pet—positive rewards for improvement. Every match you play, every step forward you take, brings you closer to becoming an ELO terrorist. Who’s a good little player? You are.

Favorite Hero: The British Woman

Now, let me introduce you to my favorite hero in Deadlock: Lady G, the British woman. It’s not her vape-scented bubblegum aura or her tectonically unfortunate dental genetics that makes her stand out. No, it’s her sheer will to throw her life away. Her most powerful ability? Committing self-harm, and it’s absolutely hilarious. Much like my visits to Northern Ireland, this hero’s talent is in her ability to blow herself up. And yes, she wields a bomb. A bomb, which at full upgrade, is more toxic than the New Delhi River.

The Bomb and Its Effects

The bomb in question functions less like an explosive and more like medieval warfare—specifically, the sort of devastation one might expect from a 14th-century Mongolian catapult. The bomb leaves behind toxic foam that does great damage over time. If you ever imagined using historical battlefield tactics in a modern game, this is your chance. Lady G’s bomb creates a zone of control that is both comical and deadly.

A Different Game Experience

But not every game centers around Lady G. Recently, I played as Paradox, another interesting hero. Paradox excels because of their manipulation abilities, especially their ultimate, Time Wall, which stops attacks mid-flight. This allows for creative plays and has the potential to turn fights in your favor. Though I love Lady G’s raw damage, Paradox brings a level of finesse and strategy that’s hard to ignore.

The Annoying Lane Duo: Cardi B and Bop

Speaking of frustrations, one of the most notorious duos is Cardi B and Bop. They combine ranged harassment with Bop’s hooking prowess. Cardi B throws thumbtacks at you, draining your health over time, while Bop lies in wait, ready to pounce. Together, they make the lane a nightmare for anyone unprepared. Think of them as more toxic than a political campaign, always in your face, always relentless.

The Intense Battle

During one intense match, Bop and Cardi B became a serious problem. While my teammate decided to feed, Bop smelled blood and went on the offensive. But this time, luck was on our side. We outmaneuvered them, dodging Bop’s hooks, dashing behind the tower, and pulling off a beautiful counterattack. Timing and patience were the keys to our success.

The Paradoxical Swap and Time Wall

At this point in the game, Paradox’s abilities came into play. A well-timed swap with a robot enemy gave us a strategic advantage. Then, Time Wall stopped Cardi’s incoming bullets, forcing her into an awkward position. That moment was cinematic perfection, and her fate was sealed with a perfectly executed headshot.

The Falconeer with C4

One final character to note is the old man, Honeywell’s disgruntled engineer, who, after getting fired for being too old, decided to take up falconry. Oh, and he strapped 10 sticks of C4 to his pet bird. Now, anytime you hear the bird’s screech, it’s a cue to run for cover and hope you’re not in his sights. This hero adds a unique level of tension to any match.

More Than Just 1v2s

It’s important to remember that Deadlock is a 6v6 game, meaning there’s far more chaos than a mere 1v2 encounter. Team fights often become incomprehensible as six players on each side engage in battle. But don’t let that discourage you. Embrace the madness and find moments where you can make a real impact.

The Start of the Chaotic Team Fight

In one of the most chaotic team fights I’ve ever experienced, everything started with a pocket gank. Our ship caught out an enemy, forcing them to retreat. Lady Gist lingered in the shadows, ready to capitalize, while Raus used telekinesis to outmaneuver our team’s Lash. Chaos erupted from that point on, but that’s where Deadlock shines—controlled chaos.

The Mid-Fight Madness

Amid the madness, Orhay went invisible and unleashed her ultimate, Bullet Dance. I arrived just in time to get swapped by the enemy and find myself in the thick of the action. Our Lash barely made it back to save the day, eliminating Lady G at the last second with a clutch ultimate.

Bop’s Hook and Hyperbeam Combo

Bop didn’t let up, though. He hooked our McGinnis and, in a brilliant combo, activated his Hyperbeam. The ensuing chaos felt like a clown chase, with Vindicta providing air support from above, and Inferna leading a charge right into the fray.

The 2v2 Showdown and Final Outcome

In the end, it boiled down to a 2v2 showdown. Ra overextended, only to be punished by Orhay, who returned without buying items. This left only Pocket, who could do nothing but watch. Meanwhile, Greaty Talon was busy elsewhere, ignoring the fight. Eventually, Shiv returned to claim victory, harvesting organs from the battlefield.

Comparing Deadlock to Chaos

A Deadlock team fight feels more like a brawl in a zoo than a strategic game. The chaos is overwhelming, but that’s part of the fun. When it works, it works beautifully, and you’ll find yourself in awe at how such madness can come together to produce a win.

Why I Recommend Deadlock

Deadlock is chaotic, confusing, and at times overwhelming. But that’s what makes it great. The thrill of mastering the chaos, turning a mess of a game into a win, is what keeps players coming back. If you’re up for the challenge, this is a game I wholeheartedly recommend.

Join the Goon Fleet

If you’re feeling adventurous, consider supporting me on Patreon for just one shekel. Join the Goon Fleet, and I’ll be eternally grateful. To those already on board, thank you. Your names are printed and stored in a unique location.

A Final Thank You

Lastly, thank you for taking the time to read through this guide and be part of the Deadlock journey. Your support means everything, and I hope you continue to enjoy what this chaotic game has to offer.

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